By Cathy Njeru
From the moment we're born, we're given a label: An identity.
For me, it was female and African. We're also given what doctors call an Apgar score, which tells us how well a baby is breathing and how well their heart is beating. I like to think that I got a good score on what was essentially my first task in life.
I was then given a name, 3 names actually. One was a symbol of what my parents hoped I would be, the second was to honour my grandmother and the third was to state that I belonged to my father. I became a daughter, sister, cousin, niece and grand-daughter.
I went to school and there too, I was labelled. I was a good student. Unfortunately, I was also what you might call a 'goody two shoes' and a teacher's pet. As you might guess, it paid off academically, not so much socially.
Fast forward to high school, that's when I received Christ at a church camp. I got a new label- Christian- and I dutifully but it in my identity box. I figured that now, whenever appropriate, I had to throw in 'born-again Christian' as part of my introductions.
Fast forward again and now, I'm done with medical school. I liked school so much I went back for my post-graduate and now I had two more labels. Doctor and Paediatrician to be specific. Those are nice shiny labels, and relatives will proudly introduce me as 'daktari'. It's also very handy for acquaintances who I suspect don't actually remember my name, they too just address me as 'daktari'.
As I've grown older, my identity box has only grown heavier. Society has thrown in its labels too. You're single, married, widowed or divorced. You're a mother or childless. You are successful or a failure. Talented or ordinary. Beautiful or average. Simple words, but each carrying a connotation of worth and how society sees you and treats you.
So where does this label- Christian- fit? Is it one among the many or is it the one thing that needs to be a foundation for all the rest? And how does that even happen when the world is always loudly reminding us that these other labels matter too?
Where the world tells me that I must chase success and money, and that the most important thing is to be happy, I try to remember that I am part of a royal priesthood. God doesn't owe me anything, including happiness. It is I who owes a debt of gratitude, it is I who must serve Him with my life. I try to hold what I have with an open hand and offer it back to God. To quote Jim Elliot,
“ ‘He is no fool who gives what he can’t keep, to gain what he can never lose.’”
When I am tempted to define myself by how well I perform, God reminds me that I am His child and well loved. Not loved less when I fail, and not treasured more when I perform. So, I don't have to live in pursuit of the world's accolades. I don't live in fear that I'll be overtaken by someone younger, more beautiful or more talented. I am free to pursue my unique calling and to do the good works He appointed for me, before the world began.
I realize, as I conclude, that there are a lot of 'Is' in this story. In my defense, it's hard to use another pronoun as I talk about identity. However, to end the story, circling around myself, is to have missed the point entirely. I am a part of 'we'. A small part in a much bigger story, a thread in a beautifully designed tapestry. I am part of a chosen people, the body of Christ, that I have been called to love and serve, even as I allow them close enough to encourage, love, and even rebuke me. I am also part of a broken world and culture that is hurting and hurtling towards self-destruction. I am called and chosen to interrupt that narrative and bring a glimpse of God's kingdom on earth.
One of the featured articles this month, reminded me of the many labels that Christ has given me. A saint, a servant, a steward, a soldier, a witness, victorious and a citizen of heaven. This is who I am, but so many times, I forget it. I am like a man under water, drowning beneath other labels and expectations. I must remember to come up, breathe deep from the truth in God's word, then keep swimming.
Cathy Njeru is a Paediatrician Doctor at Gertrude's Children Hospital. She has a passion for supporting families of children cancer patients. She is the Nairobi Cohort 2021.